Heavy Drinker

“Surely a woman never looks prettier than when making tea.” ~Mary Elizabeth Braddon, Lady Audley’s Secret


photo credit: commons.wikimedia.org

photo credit: commons.wikimedia.org

 

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Given what you know about my background as a strict, teetotalling, Southern Baptist (now a Recovering Baptist), it might surprise you to know that I am, in fact, a heavy drinker. My drinking “vice” is actually virtuous, though, as I drink over a gallon of water per day, and I have definite opinions about how it should be served. Shocking that I have opinions, I know.

photo credit: cleanwateraction.org

photo credit: cleanwateraction.org

Since beginning The 30-Day Exercise Challenge (Hey, Challenge peeps! Mama Heather loves y’all!), my water intake has increased dramatically. Add in the over-100-degree temps here in North Texas, and you’ve got yourself a two-gallon-a-day blogger here. Easy.

In the more recent past, I’ve added tea to my daily, heavy-drinking regimen.

photo credit: commons.wikimedia.org

photo credit: commons.wikimedia.org

Since I’m a Southerner, you might assume that I drink sweet, iced tea, but that is simply not the case. In fact, I can’t remember ever having picked Sweet Tea when given a choice. I know that probably shocks those of y’all that live somewhere that has snow or other inappropriate weather, but it’s true! Call me Uncle Si (he drinks unsweet tea, too!).

I do, however, want my tea, like my water, to be ice cold. That is,  unless I’m having hot peppermint tea. Or hot pumpkin spice tea. Or hot vanilla tea. Or…oh, nevermind.


Almost daily, I field a question or two about what kind of tea I drink, how I prepare it, where to buy it, etc. Currently, I drink the equivalent of four cups of tea per day (not including the ones I drink for ‘fun’), some of which is for weight loss, others for other health reasons.

Let me break it down for you:

1 cup equivalent of Roasted Dandelion Root Tea per day

1 cup equivalent of Decaf Green Tea per day

2 cups equivalent of Red Raspberry Leaf Tea per day

Before I go to bed, I use my favorite (hands-down), if-you-don’t-have-one-of-these-you’re-missing-out-on-life kitchen appliance, my electric tea kettle {affiliate link} to heat up a kettle-full of water to boiling. I lay out three coffee mugs. I put each type of tea into each mug ( 1 bag of Dandelion in one, 1 bag of Green Tea in one, and 2 bags of Raspberry Leaf in one), then I fill each with boiling water. I let them sit on the counter and steep overnight.

In the morning, I prepare them this way:

The Dandelion tea gets poured into two quart-sized Mason jars (half in each). Then, I begin to build my detox tea {recipe here} by adding cranberry juice and lemon juice to each jar. I add ice and fill the rest with water. I drink these two quarts over the course of the day. This particular version of tea is designed to pull excess water off of your body and, boy, does it work! Stay close to the bathroom, man. “They” claim you can use it to lose 5 pounds in 7 days. “I” say I’m just happy to have my eyes and hands not be so swollen and my headache go away. If bitter is not your thing (and I get that), you could add a little stevia, Truvia, or other natural sweetener of choice. This tea is naturally decaffeinated.

The Green Tea I drink straight. I’m hard-core that way. It’s supposed to aid in weight loss. I’ve used it in the past and had good results, and I need all the help I can get. This tea is very caffeinated but, since caffeine and my body are sworn enemies, I buy a decaf version. If you play well with caffeine, go for it. The caffeine should actually help your body burn more calories.

The Red Raspberry Tea is my favorite. I do drink it Sweet-Tea style. I pour the entire cup of two-bag concentrate into a third Mason jar, add stevia to sweeten, and fill the rest of the jar with ice and water. I usually drink it with my breakfast. What is the purpose of Raspberry Tea, you ask? It helps, um, female issues. The older I get, and all. The first month I started drinking this wonder tea, “that time” was like a night-and-day difference from the month before. No pain. No bloating. No moodiness. Other than the usual, of course. My family members call it my Uterus Tea. They want me to drink it and eagerly serve it to me in my Wonder Woman mug. For reals. This tea, too, is naturally decaffeinated.

These mixes could easily be doubled, tripled, or more to make a bigger batch for the week.


Here are Amazon {affiliate} links to the different tea varieties I use, in case you have trouble finding these specialty teas in your neck-of-the-woods. They are available at Target and Whole Foods for immediate-gratification people, but Amazon’s prices are actually better. And also this: free two-day shipping, people! Waaaay cheaper than a trip to the doctor and meds, in the case of the Raspberry Tea.

Amazon: Shopping for Introverts.

Buy: Electric Tea Kettle

Buy: Roasted Dandelion Root Tea

Buy: Green Tea (caffeinated)

Buy: Green Tea (decaffeinated)

Buy: Red Raspberry Leaf Tea


COMING SOON

Don’t miss the mid-point update on The 30-Day Exercise Challenge! Friday is Day 15 (that’s halfway, for the non-mathematicians in the house), and I’m excited to tell y’all what’s going on here and hear from you about what’s going on at your house with Jillian. Y’all didn’t kill her, did y’all?

Aaaaand, in plenty of time for y’all to prepare and recruit your friends and family, I’m announcing the NEXT 30-Day Exercise Challenge! One that will take us all the way to the end of October! And you know I’ve got plans for after that….mwahahaha!

Also, a SURPRISE GIVEAWAY for Challengers! Y’all do NOT want to miss this one! Or maybe two!

Subscribe to receive the emails every time a new post is published so you’re not left out. Also, join The 30-Day Exercise Challenge group on Facebook (women only!) to read the daily battlefield reports from over 800 Challengers! The encouragement and support is unbeatable and free! Free is in my budget.

See y’all there!

Cheesy-Garlic Chicken Biscuit Redux

Pinterest Photo

So, um, yesterday I posted a little ditty about these. Apparently the good people who run my server thought that it would be a good idea to do maintenance at the same time I was publishing this life-changing recipe. And also that not alerting me to this maintenance was a good idea. Therefore, many of my gracious and faithful readers were unable to gain access to the post.

That, my friends, is what we in the blogging biz call a travesty.

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I am writing this post to let you know that (a) you need this food in your life and (b) all server maintenance people are on punishment.

Cheesy-Garlic Chicken Biscuits (Low-Carb/THM-S)

TCB,
Heather

Cheesy-Garlic Chicken Biscuits (Low-Carb/THM-S)

“The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken.” ~Maya Angelou


Awhile back, my mother sent me this photo via Spacebook:

photo credit: buzzfeed.com

photo credit: buzzfeed.com

Thaaaat’s right. Somebody took a Chick-fil-A chicken patty and put it on a Red Lobster Garlic-Cheese Biscuit. Mama knows I’m trying to eat right, and there ain’t nothin’ about this that’s right.  For a good 23.498 seconds, I hated her stinkin’ guts. Then, I remembered what she had taught me, “Honor your mother and your father that your days may be long upon the earth.” Not wanting to get struck down my lightning, I repented of my attitude and set out on a course to recreate this little beauty in a way that was more figure-friendly.

Here she is:

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To recap:

photo credit: buzzfeed.com

photo credit: buzzfeed.com

Good but bad for you (above). Good AND good for you (below).

DSC_0003

Here’s how it all went down.

 I love, love, love these Cheesy-Cheese Garlic Biscuits from Satisfying Eats. If these don’t taste just like Red Lobster’s Garlic-Cheese Biscuits, I don’t know what does. They are the best biscuit I’ve had while on THM. On the side of a satisfying “S” meal, they are spectacular. In terms of this recipe, though, they fell a little flat…literally. When they bake, they spread and become like little disks: good for sopping up Cheeseburger Pie juice, bad for holding a friend chicken patty.

Enter the muffin tin. I tweaked the recipe by baking the individual portions in muffin tins rather than on a baking sheet, producing a taller biscuit. One that was more easily split horizontally for chicken patty insertion.

And now for the chicken: did you know they sell thin-cut boneless, skinless chicken breasts at the store now? I didn’t use them because I have an angst-filled teenager and an iron skillet, but they do…sell them, I mean. I just lined up some regular chicken breasts on the counter between two pieces of waxed paper, gave the teenager the iron skillet, and let her whack them until they were flat.

Never underestimate the harnessed power of teen angst in the kitchen, people.

If you’re lacking said angsty teen, the thin-cut ones will work just fine. Once they were pounded, I took a biscuit cutter that was similar in size to the biscuit-muffins and traced around it with a sharp knife. I got two chicken circles per breast. Dip the chicken circles in egg wash, a trip through the breading, fry, insert into split, buttered biscuit, and you’re ready to eat!

Beyond unbelievable. Printable below. Y’all eat!

Pinterest Photo

Cheesy-Garlic Chicken Biscuits

  • Servings: 10-12
  • Time: 45 mins
  • Difficulty: moderate
  • Print

recipe compiled by http://www.adventuresinwomanland.com

Biscuits (modified from Cheesy-Cheese Garlic Biscuits from www.satisfyingeats.com)
Modification
Instead of baking on a baking sheet, drop into greased muffin tins. Bake at 350 degrees for 15-20 minutes or until golden.

Chicken
Ingredients
3 boneless, skinless chicken breasts, pounded flat OR 6 thin-cut boneless, skinless breasts
2 egg whites
2 whole eggs
1/3 cup EITHER coconut flour, almond flour, or crushed pork rinds (taster’s choice)
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
coconut oil (for frying)

Instructions

1. In a large skillet, melt coconut oil over medium heat.
2. In one flat dish, break two whole eggs and beat slightly.
3. In another flat dish, mix flour/rinds, two egg whites, and Parmesan. This should be a little clumpy. Embrace the clump.
4. Flatten breasts (or use thin-cut) then, using a biscuit cutter or glass as a pattern, cut two circles out of each breast.
5. Dip chicken circles in egg wash, then press into flour/rind mixture to coat well.
6. Fry in batches in hot coconut oil, just until golden. DO NOT overfry. You can finish these in the (already hot because you just baked biscuits) oven until done in the middle.
7. Split biscuits down the middle horizontally. Insert one chicken patty into each biscuit. Enjoy!

THM-Friendly School Lunch Ideas

“Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what’s for lunch.” ~Orson Welles


lunch edited

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Is this that time already? Is it just me, or does it seem like the summer gets shorter and shorter each year?

Awhile back, I put out a survey, and boy did you respond! Thank you! Many of you have asked for THM-friendly school lunch ideas, but the truth is that what you probably just need are ideas…any old school lunch ideas. Sure, they could be on-plan, but around about mid-October the 987th peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich is looking rather uninspired, and you just want something new. And even though we homeschool our kids, the truth is I need ideas too, if only for packing my husband’s lunch.

The ideas on this post, which are THM-Friendly but just plain, old good lunches, make a few assumptions:

1. Your child(ren) have no access to a microwave or other heating machinery at the place where they eat lunch. While I used to work at a school that did provide microwaves for student use, I know these are few and far between, and I understand why. The ideas here will be presented assuming the food will be eaten cold or from a Thermos (do people even use those anymore?) of some sort. If they do have microwave access…BONUS!

2. Your child(ren) do have an insulated lunch bag/box/suitcase and an ice pack/cold pack of some sort to keep things cool between the time you pack them and the time they eat them. Also, soup and smoothie ideas assume a Thermos or other insulated bottle of some type.

3. Your child(ren) are interested in, or at least willing to, eat food that’s on-plan. Many of the ideas here are just that…ideas. If you didn’t tell the child(ren) they were on-plan, they might not even know. That’s the power of motherhood. Mwahaha.

4. Your child(ren) are sticking with either S or E meals. Creating an S-Helper, Fuel Pull, or Crossover are easy tweaks.

5. That “lunch” is a relative term in post-modernity and “breakfast” items like eggs or “dinner” items like steak can be eaten at “lunchtime”.

6. That this list is not, by any means, comprehensive but is a get-you-started, mix-and-match kick-off-the-school-year list.

7. That I have no idea what your babies are allergic to/like/don’t like, so do what works for them, man!


Sandwiches and Wraps

The variations here are endless. May I submit to you that making and refrigerating Gwen’s Easy Bread be something you incorporate into your weekly routine? Like sweet-tea-making here in The South. Two pieces of Gwen’s Bread make the basis for a great E sandwich. And also this: low-carb wraps. Amen.

Low-fat/sugar-free lunchmeat of choice (mix it up, man!) with low-fat cheese slices, low-fat mayo and/or mustard and choice of veggies on either Gwen’s Bread, Ezekiel Bread or low-carb wraps (E); recommendation…buy meat from the deli…when caught on-sale it’s cheaper than the pre-packaged stuff and they’ll slice it how you like it…we ask for shaved. Shaved’s the bomb.
Two scrambled eggs (not just for breakfast, man!) with full-fat cheese and regular mayo (throw in some meat if you want) on low-carb wrap only (S); wrap in a paper towel and aluminum foil for insulation…should stay warm until lunch
Tuna/chicken/egg/ham/turkey salad (cooked, chopped meat/egg with mayo and seasonings or add avocado too!) with/without choice of veggies on low-carb wrap only (S)
PB&J wraps using on-plan peanut butter and jam…watch your portions (E/S)
Hebrew National 97% fat-free beef hot dogs wrapped in Gwen’s Bread and baked ahead of time with Ranch mustard dip (E)
Same hot dogs topped with shredded full-fat cheese and wrapped in low-carb wraps with mustard dip (S)
Veggies-only sammie with low-fat mayo and a drizzle of balsamic vinegar on Gwen’s Bread (E)
Leftover meat wrap (grilled steak, roasted chicken, cooked turkey slices, ham steak, bacon, turkey bacon…endless possibilities) (S)
Mexican wrap (cooked ground turkey breast seasoned with taco seasoning with beans and light cheese and veggies on wrap) (E)


Smoothies

Smoothies are generally best right out of the blender, but they can be good later on. My husband takes his in a Mason jar to work and, when he’s ready to drink it, gives it a hearty shake and drinks it down. Any smoothie or protein shake that you would normally make, pour into an insulated Thermos-type bottle and pack in the bag with an ice pack. When your little precious one is ready to drink it, he/she just needs to give it a quick shake and go for it.
Tip #1: Funky straws are fun for littles (and me, too!). Bed, Bath, and Beyond sells milkshake straws for $1.99 per bag.
Tip #2: Pour ice-water into Thermos or insulated bottle then empty it out before putting shake in. That way, the bottle’s already cold, helping the smoothie keep its temperature.
Tip #3: Throw some greens into your little person’s smoothie. Spinach is a mild-flavored beginner green. Increase the amount gradually over time and, chances are, they won’t even notice. The blueish-purple of blueberries covers the green nicely. Just sayin’.

Soups

My teenager loves the Just-Like Campbell’s Tomato Soup from the book. We make it in batches of four times the recipe and keep individual portions in the fridge. The light Progresso soups are also on-plan, as are any number of soups, both in the book and on Pinterest and blogs. The possibilities are endless.

The technique is simple.  In the morning, fill the Thermos or other insulated bottle with hot, hot water and allow to sit for a few minutes in the morning. Heat the soup separately. Then, pour the hot water out of the bottle, pour the hot soup into the bottle, close the bottle tightly and pack away from the cold stuff. On a day when soup is packed, try a side of some type of flourless cracker or other non-cold items.

Sides

Apple dippers with peanut butter dip (Greek yogurt, defatted peanut flour, sweetener) (E)
Veggie dippers with Ranch dip (Greek yogurt, dry Ranch seasoning) (FP)
On-plan blue corn chips (watch portions) (E)
Flourless crackers: Just-Like Wheat Thins or other from the book or Homemade Cheez-It’s (S); add some Greek Ranch dip for kicks
Mashed sweet potato (bake, remove from jacket and mash with cinnamon and sweetener) (E)
One portion of fruit (E)
Cottage cheese or Greek yogurt with berries, sweetener and vanilla extract (FP)
Side green salad with Ranch (S) or light balsamic (E)
Baked Cinnamon Apple Chips (E)

Leftovers

Don’t discount the power of the leftover in school lunches: leftover Fooled Ya Pizza is especially delicious!
Use leftover, cooked meat to make wraps, salads or delicious egg scrambles.
You get the idea…

Treats

Give the kid a sweet treat, would ya?
Mine love the Peanut Squares from the book or any cookie coming out of Mrs. Criddle’s Kitchen.
What about a slice of on-plan banana bread? Or even a half-slice?
These Coconut-Flour Chocolate Chip Cookies are the poo, and the recipe makes a ton. Flash-freeze baked and cooled cookies on a sheet pan then put frozen cookies into a large Ziploc freezer bag. Pop a couple of frozen cookies into the lunchbag and, by lunchtime, they’ll be ready to eat! Do this with just about any cookie.
A small portion of Brownie Batter Overnight Oatmeal. This stuff is like candy, man!
If you’re packing an insulated bag, why not some skinny chocolate?

 Drinks

Any of the sippers would work in an insulated bottle for lunchtime drinks.
Consider a fruit-tea version brewed and cooled then sweetened with on-plan sweetener.
Here’s a cool idea that my mom used to use when packing my lunch when I was a kid. Of course, she packed me a Diet Coke, but you could just as easily substitute Zevia or other on-plan, canned colas. The night before, take one can of refrigerated soda, double wrap in paper towel, then wrap in aluminum foil. Place in freezer overnight. When packing lunches the next day, put cold soda in lunch bag. By lunchtime, the soda can be unwrapped and should still be ice-cold but not frozen. There may sometimes be icy bits…love that!
WATER! 🙂


Does this help you get started? I mean, I haven’t even started talking about muffins yet! I’d love for you to post additional ideas in the comments section below for everyone to see. Mamas helping mamas is powerful stuff, man! Mamas gotta stick together.


DON’T FORGET!

My GIVEAWAY ends this Sunday, August 3! Click here for details.

My sweet friend Sarah’s GIVEAWAY over at Mrs. Criddle’s Kitchen ends Sunday, too! Y’all go show her some love!

The 30-Day Exercise Challenge starts Monday. If you don’t want to join us, at least pray for us, will ya? Jillian’s a BEAST, man!

Creamy-Dreamy Crab Dip

“Big sisters are the crab grass in the lawn of life.” ~Charles M. Schultz


Pinterest Picture

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Big Daddy loves crab cakes. Everywhere we eat, no matter what part of the country or what type of restaurant, if they have ’em, he orders ’em.  He spots them in his first, cursory menu glance. Sometimes he gets them for an appetizer (before his steak…semper carnivore); other times, he eats them alone. Then he goes to get ice cream. He’s pretty predictable that way.

The problem with crab cakes when you’re on a carb-aware type eating plan is that they are chock-full of breadcrumbs. While I could make a breadcrumb-free version of crab cakes (I know. I know.), I thought I’d let him try this dip out instead and see if he liked it.

Creamy-Dreamy Crab Dip

Big Daddy gives this dip a hearty two thumbs up. And Big Daddy didn’t get to be Big Daddy by not knowing about good food.

It’s easy. It’s quick. It’s Big-Daddy-approved. What more could a recipe achieve? Served with veggie dippers or flourless crackers for crunch, it’s a creamy and flavorful take on seafood. Big Daddy likes those mini sweet peppers. I’m thinking this dip would be good on them. He’s thinking what I’m thinking.

Creamy-Dreamy Crab Dip

  • Servings: 6-8
  • Time: 30mins
  • Difficulty: easy
  • Print

courtesy of http://www.adventuresinwomanland.com
Instagram Photo

Ingredients
5 oz. 1/3 less fat cream cheese, room temperature
2 TBS reduced-fat mayonnaise
3 tsp prepared horseradish
1/2 tsp lemon juice
1/2 TBS white cooking wine (omit if desired)
1/2 TBS almond milk (or other liquid)
4.25 oz can white crab meat, drained and flaked
Paprika

Instructions
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2. Mix cream cheese, mayo, horseradish, lemon juice, wine, and milk together until fluffy.
3. Fold in crab meat.
4. Pour into greased baking dish.
5. Sprinkle lightly with paprika.
6. Bake for 20 minutes or until hot and bubbly.

Serve on crackers or veggie dippers.


Don’t forget about the GIVEAWAY going on this week! One lucky subscriber wins his/her choice of a Trim Healthy Mama book, three bags of THM Sweet Blend, a hand weight set, or a Camelbak water bottle. Click here for details.

Also, my best-good friend, Sarah, over at Mrs. Criddle’s Kitchen has a GIVEAWAY going on this week, too! Y’all head over there, check out some of her delicious recipes and enter to win!

Both end Sunday, August 3, so y’all hurry up!

Printable Meal Plan Plus A GIVEAWAY

Author’s Note: This is NOT an official THM post. This is my story, my strategy, a portion of my journey down the THM road. THM stands for Trim Healthy Mama, the title of a book written by Serene Allison and Pearl Barrett. The book outlines a break from the (or at least my) American tradition in terms of thinking about food, a call to eat and enjoy food the way God intended it. Besides owning the book and subscribing to this way of eating, and routinely purchasing and enjoying their sweeteners, I am not otherwise associated with or employed by THM. I’m ‘just’ a regular Mama…like you. This post was written under the assumption that the reader has/has access to the book and holds a basic understanding of the meal types and eating cycles. If you don’t currently have the book, go buy it, man!

While there are few guarantees in life, I guarantee that any errors made here are completely mine and absolutely unintended. If you’ll let me know about them in a most gracious and loving manner, I’ll try to fix ’em quickly. If you’re determined to be mean and nasty, eat some cake. That always helps me feel better.

Author’s Note, Part Deux: To learn more about my weekly meal-planning process, click here.

Author’s Note, III: I’m going to make Peanut Squares now. Amen.


If you like FREE stuff, you’ll want to read all the way to the bottom of this post!

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veggies edited

Last week, I offered up my meal-planning strategies to you in the hopes of helping other Mamas. I included my personal first week’s meal plan and grocery list, in addition to a blank, meal-planning printable so that you could go forth and meal-plan like a boss. Remember this? 🙂

Blank Meal Plan Sheet

I also included a survey asking for feedback on further meal planning, and, boy did you respond! Thank you!

You said you wanted more Fuel Pull meals and snacks, and you’ll see them added to this week’s meals. You said you’re on a budget (me, too!), and this week’s meal plan is perfect for that, offering lots of inexpensive options and opportunities to stretch one food staple across many meals (whole chickens are cheap, man!). You said your kids were starting back to school soon (already?) and you wanted school lunch ideas. Coming right up…sometime this week, so stay tuned (I’d love to include YOUR ideas if you’d be willing to leave them in the comments section of this post)! I hope I hit all of your highlights, but, if you want more or less of something on next week’s plan, I welcome your feedback.

Here’s this week’s plan >>>>>>  My THM Meal Plan Week Two

Simply print it out, make your grocery list (You’re ready! You can do this! I believe in you! Don’t forget the toilet paper!), cross off what you already have at home (This makes me feel so accomplished and powerful! I really should get out more.), and shop away. And don’t worry if you can’t start it on Sunday. Just start Sunday’s meals on your Day 1 of the week. There should be no super-secret-squirrel ingredients in any of these meals, with a few exceptions. In those cases, I’ve noted a work-around, or you can substitute that meal/snack with something else entirely. If you’d like to order the defatted peanut flour mentioned on the meal plan, this one is the one I use.

On the meal plan, I’ve utilized primarily recipes from the book. They feel safe. However, I did start being more adventurous in my second week and branched out to The Blogosphere, Pinterest, and other forums for recipes.

Here are direct links to the non-book recipes I reference on this week’s meal plan:

Gwen’s Easy Bread from Gwen’s Nest: We would be eating this if we were not on THM! I use 4 1/2 cups whole wheat flour and 2 cups all-purpose.

Cousin Carolyn’s Low-Carb Cabbage from Adventures in Womanland

Cheesy-Cheese Garlic Biscuits from Satisfying Eats

Coconut Flour Chocolate Chip Cookies from Counting All Joy

Brownie Batter Overnight Oatmeal from Dashing Dish

Cheeseburger Quesadillas from Gwen’s Nest

Almond Flour Cheese Crackers from The Grassfed Mama

Pretzel Dogs from Gwen’s Nest

Apple Pancake Bake from Mrs. Criddle’s Kitchen

Cheesy Chicken Enchiladas from A Home With Purpose


And now for the best part! FREE STUFF!

Next weekend, my teenager is going to choose one person from my subscriber list to receive a free goodie! Winner has the choice of receiving ONE of the following:

Trim Healthy Mama book

Three bags of THM Sweet Blend sweetener

This hand-weight set, especially timely for those of you following The 30-Day Exercise Challenge

Camelback water bottle in winner’s choice of color

Once you enter your email address in the box at the top, right corner of this page and become a subscriber, you’re entered. Current subscribers are already entered to win! Get crackin’!


**Giveaway sponsored solely by AinW.**


COMING SOON

On deck this week: Mom Hack designed to stop the sippy cup/dirty glass madness

Creamy New England Crab Spread (THM-S/Low-Carb)

School Lunch Ideas that are THM-Friendly

Summer-Fresh Broccoli Salad

“I do not like broccoli. And I haven’t liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I’m President of the United States and I’m not going to eat any more broccoli.”

~Former President George H.W. Bush


Summer-Fresh Broccoli Salad (THM-S/Low-Carb)

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I have never, not for one day, liked broccoli. Every member of my household loves broccoli and would eat it every night if I were willing to stink up my kitchen cook it regularly. It smells like feet. And it smells even worse warmed up in the microwave the next day. Plus, it’s got a creepy texture.

If the Lord wanted me to eat broccoli, He’d have made it to taste like a doughnut.

When I was a teenager, my mom (a weirdo broccoli-lover) found a recipe for a broccoli salad, probably in a church cookbook somewhere. Apparently she thought it would go over big-time, because she made it and put it on the table…at Thanksgiving! Thaaaaat’s right. Right there, beside the turkey and dressing, the sweet potatoes, the green beans, the corn, the mashed potatoes, the macaroni-and-cheese, and the pumpkin and pecan pies, was a big, ole bowl of broccoli salad. She’s got a lot of nerve, my mama! While I’m not at liberty to repeat what was said once I realized there was flippin’ broccoli on the Thanksgiving table (I’m trying to get more sanctified about these things), I can tell you this: there was an eyeroll involved. Let’s just say I was less than thankful.

She challenged me to try the parts that were not broccoli-related, which I did begrudgingly. To my utter shock and amazement though, after one bite, I was hooked. Another eyeroll, this time from my mama (Can YOU imagine having me for a child? God bless her.). The dressing is addictive. It’s sweet and tangy and creamy-dreamy goodness. Right then I decided that, even if it meant eating broccoli, I was eating as much of that dressing as I could. Shoot, man. You could whip up a batch of this dressing and pour it over an old shoe, and…nevermind.

While the original recipe calls for white sugar and raisins (both ingredients that add to the sweetness factor but are off-plan on a low-carb/THM-style diet), I have modified it to be more low-carb, perfect for an S-style side dish! However, if you are not sugar-free or low-carb, I’ll include the sugar conversion, too. Because I love you, you sugar fiend.


A Word About Mayonnaise:

Duke's Mayonnaise

The dressing for this salad is mayo-based; thus, the need for a little behind-the-scenes information. In our house, mayonnaise is not just something we put on a sandwich or mix into our deviled eggs. Mayonnaise is something to savor, a condiment that brings new life to dishes, even when used sparingly. As such, I’m pretty picky about what kind of mayo we use; I’m a mayonnaise snob, if you will. And even if you won’t. We only use Duke’s mayo. A serving size contains 100 calories and NO sugars and NO carbs. Plus, it’s the best-tasting mayo on the market (educated opinion  backed by anecdotal evidence), hands-down. I can find it at Kroger here in Texas; however, if you live in a market where it’s not carried, you can buy it here. It’s a bit pricey, but worth every penny.


Summer-Fresh Broccoli Salad

DSC_0149 edited

Easy peasy. See those ingredients up there? Throw them into a bowl. Mix up the dressing in another bowl. Pour dressing over dry ingredients. Thoroughly combine. Cover and store in fridge. The longer it sits; the better it gets. To a point, of course.

Summer-Fresh Broccoli Salad (THM-S/Low-Carb)

  • Servings: 8-10
  • Time: 20mins
  • Difficulty: easy
  • Print

Summer-Fresh Broccoli Salad
courtesy of http://www.adventuresinwomanland.com
Summer-Fresh Broccoli Salad (THM-S/Low-Carb)

Ingredients
Two heads of broccoli, trimmed and cut into bite-sized pieces
1/2 cup pine nuts
1/2 cup slivered almonds
1/2 small red onion, diced
1/2 lb. bacon, fried crisp then chopped into bits
1 cup Duke’s mayonnaise
2 Tbs. white wine vinegar (or plain white vinegar
sweetener*

Instructions
1. Combine first five ingredients in large mixing bowl.
2. Whisk together mayo, vinegar and sweetener in separate small mixing bowl.
3. Pour dressing over dry ingredients. Mix until combined.
4. Store, covered, in fridge.

*Sweetener notes: I use 8 teaspoons of THM’s Sweet Blend (a stevia/erythritol mix) in this recipe. However, sugar to taste or the equivalent in honey could be used. Of course, you could also use plain stevia, xylitol or any other of a number of options.

Variations
Don’t like onions? Leave them out. Want onion flavor? Add a bit of onion powder to the dressing.
Want less fat? Use light mayo. Watch carbs, though! Decrease the amount of nuts used for lower fat, too.
Okay with sugar? Replace the Sweet Blend with white sugar or honey. Add raisins or dried cranberries.
Not a pork eater? Use turkey bacon instead. A little salt may be needed, since the pork bacon provides that component.
Want a different, tangy flavor? Try balsamic vinegar in place of the white wine vinegar. Apple cider vinegar would work, too!


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