Confucius Say…

As I noted earlier, I’ve started two, new doctoral classes this week.


I have only a few more to go until I begin my dissertation.

Double oy.

Topic, anyone? Anyone?

Anyway, one of my classes covers the history of education. I LOVE history of any form (except the bloody, war kind) and am having a blast learning about things that would put most people directly into a coma.

One of my books for that class takes the reader (that’s me!) through the history of education chronologically by educator. We started with Confucius.  I can’t figure out why. I think we should have started with God. I say He taught Noah how to build an ark in an age sorely lacking in power tools, so He must be pretty good at it. Of course, it did take Noah 100 years to build the sucker.

When I write my own history-of-education book, that’s where I’m starting. I’m sure they’ll be lined up at the Books-A-Million to get that one.

Back to Confucius.  Here he is, the handsome devil.

I’ll say this: if more American teachers looked like this, less American students would be shooting up schools and such. They’d be too scared. Next time I teach a class, I’m thinking of wearing this outfit.  It appears to hide those “problem areas,” you know what I mean? And the intimidation factor is definitely there.

I guess, prior to reading about this man, I thought of him this way:

Heck, all I’d ever heard of him was “Confucius Say” sayings.

For example:

Confucius say, “An optimist is a girl who regards a bulge as a curve.”

Call me an optimist. I’m very curvy.

Or Confucius say, “It’s okay to sit on your pity pot now and again. Just be sure to flush when you’re done.”

Or Confucius say, “The best time to go to the dentist is tooth hurty.”

Or, my personal favorite, Confucius say, “Man who go to bed with itchy tail wake up with stinky hand.”

Men. What are you gonna do?

However, after reading real Confucius sayings, I can see that I was way off. While he seemed dazed and confused on ideas relating to God and heaven, the man had a point on a few issues. Here are some of his quotes, in honor of voting time. GO VOTE!

“The ancients who wished to illustrate illustrious virtue throughout the kingdom, first ordered well their own states. Wishing to order well their states, they first regulated their families. Wishing to regulate their families, they first cultivated their persons.”

I know, duh, right?

Can I get an, “Amen”?

“What is meant by making the thoughts sincere is allowing no self-deception.”

“Riches adorn a house. Virtue adorns the person.”

“…the government of the state depends on the regulation of the family.”

“It is only the truly virtuous [person] who can love or who can hate others.”

“To see men of worth and not be able to raise them to office; to raise them to office, but not to do so quickly: this is disrespectful. To see bad men and not be able to remove them, to remove them but not to do so to a distance: this is weakness.”

I’m so excited about that one, if I was my friend Christy’s weiner dog, I would have just peed a little bit.

But I’m not. And I didn’t. I don’t think.

If I could get past Ephesians 2:8 and Proverbs 1:7, I think I’d be a Confucian.

Feeding my quote addiction,


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